This came with a toy we gave Jillian for her birthday. I thought it was too good not to share. Sometimes as parents we wonder how much and in what way we can share Christ with them. Click on Spiritual Stepping Stones once there. Enjoy!
http://one2believe.com/freeresources.asp
I'm going to share some personal financials with y'all but I do it with a purpose. This is an election year and I encourage everyone to consider something that affects each of us, especially those of us with families: medical insurance costs.
You all know us, healthy young couple with three kids. We have a standard PPO (preferred provider option) plan with a major insurer. Jon's employer covered his costs but we paid out of pocket monthly for four dependents $190.14. This is for a plan with a deductible of $500 per individual or a family deductible of $1500. Each office visit had a co-pay of $20 and we paid 20% out of pocket for a preferred provider and 70% out of pocket for a non-preferred provider.
To give you an idea of what we paid out each year, this year in AUGUST, we have met our family deductible of $1500. We have paid out co-pays of approximately $60 per month ($480) and currently have an outstanding invoice equaling $1005.00 for some cardiology work-ups for Jillian and Eli. We pay an additional approximate $50 per month in misc. costs from the 20% we owe at each visit.
Using these numbers our out of pocket expenses for this year will be somewhere around $5101.00!
And that doesn't include births. I paid around $2000 out of pocket to the hospital and $500 for my OB care and an additonal $500 for anesthesia.
Jon has started a new job and we have a lapse in care for 30 days. COBRA notified me that the per month cost for our family of five will be $1100.00.
This is absolutely ridiculous. And we have "good" plan with "affordable" rates. There are millions of uninsured people in our country and inability to afford a quality plan is one of the top reasons. We make a decent income. I cannot imagine paying $5000 per year on an income our government would deem middle class.
Please consider the financial strain this places on low and middle class income families as you look at the upcoming elections. Listen to the options being presented by the presidential candidates and consider what it means not only for your family but families across America. We are fortunate that while this is an expense that is no fun to pay it does not place financial stress or uncertainty on us. Insurance costs however continue to spiral out of control while insurance companies make it harder and harder for people to qualify. At minimum, families shouldn't face inadequate or no coverage for their children. Medical care should be something affordable and available to the American public and a priority of all elected officials, regardless of political affiliation.
We went to Oregon in June for my grandpa's memorial service. I have so many pictures to post but wanted to share this picture of my extended family all together. My Dad has six brothers and sisters and we all gathered together to celebrate my Grandpa's life. Its rare for us to all be together which makes this picture even more special. Enjoy and I'll post more Oregon memories in the next week.
Jillian, my dear, today you are three! For the last six months you have been telling everyone you were "two and a half" even up through yesterday. Now your birthday is finally here! When you arrived you blessed our family. You were our biggest baby and turned out to have the biggest, sweetest personality as well. You bring laughter to our lives and smiles to our faces. You love to love. You love to dance. You love to sing. You are caring toward others, sensitive and thoughtful. You make us laugh with the way you see life and you definitely fill your name as Jillian means 'youthful' and I believe you will always have a youthful, joyful perspective on life. We love you, Jilly Rose!
"I was overjoyed to find some of your children walking in the truth...But now, dear lady, I ask you, not as though I were writing another commandment, but one we have had from the beginning, let us love one another. " 2 John 4 NSRV
Wow. So, I read a lot of blogs. I love keeping up on them, especially the ones about family and mothering. But its rare to see a mom post about the times when she's going crazy, ready to call it quits (whatever that looks like when you run the house). Well, I've had that kind of a week. I've broken down a lot this week in tears or anger. The kids are challenging and demanding. I'm feeling at a loss for how to discipline them or mold their little personalities into something beautiful. I've prayed and prayed that God would show me how to handle these challenges and how to handle my children.
Last night I cried out that God would reveal to me how to respond to Ava and Jillian, how to fix this mess. I opened my calendar today and saw this verse and I knew that God had been faithful once again in answering me. Of course this was not what I was expecting and immediately I felt that this was God correcting me, not encouraging me! See, the kiddos love God. I spend a lot of time talking about God, singing praises, praying, reading and I often pride myself on being an example to them in these things. What I felt God tell me I was missing was Love. I'm not loving them enough. Not encouraging them enough. My days are spent yelling and correcting far more than loving and offering grace. Wow. Let us love one another. How simple but how difficult. Loving my girls when they are completely unlovable is challenging but its what I know God is asking me to do. Thank you, Lord for reminding me what matters most. Thank you for your faithfulness in answering my prayer.
Now, I'm off to love.
Yahoo so kindly reminded me that its almost draft time for the fantasy leagues. So, we've got our Go Deep! fantasy league all set up for the 2008-2009 season. I'm sure most of you have heard about our secret little pastime in the Olson house. Its made a football believer out of me (Sara). We're always looking for friends to join us so if you're interested drop me a note and I'll send you an invite to join. If you join however, you've gotta stay on top and play!
And just a note, I would not advise drafting more than one Bengal player as your stars in a given year. Just a little lesson I learned from last year. Darn Chad Johnson!
Go teams!
My, we have a budding attorney on our hands! I had mentioned to Jon that I wanted us to discuss having the kids stay in church with us for worship and then take them to their classes but I wasn't sure how they were going to feel about it nor what they were going to miss . Well, Ava overheard our conversation and (verbatim, people) said the following:
"Mom and Dad, I have three reasons why I do not want to go to your class. They are:
Number One: No toys
Number Two: No snack
Three: No playtime
Those are my three reasons why I do not want to go to your class."
What can you say to that clearly laid out argument? Jon chuckled and responded with, "Well, that's a clear and concise argument. I cannot disagree with any of your statements." and we just started laughing. I wish you could have heard her confidence. There was no way we were going to win that one!
I came across these today and had to let out a little sigh. They grow so fast. I can't believe these precious little babes are my active little girls today. Amazing.
Ava
"Now I live to bring you praise..."
We were singing this in church yesterday and this very verse seemed to at the same time convict and bless my spirit. I've been doing a study on Daniel and we were discussing this week the way the King had used the goblets from the temple, holy objects, in an unholy way.
The holy being used for the unholy.
I have thought frequently over this last week how I, filled with His holiness, may not always be participating in holy things. If I proclaim a change in my life, proclaim that I am dedicated to Christ, then how does that look in my day to day life? Am I truly living to bring praise to God?
I'm not. I know I'm not. I can think of a million things and thoughts that are anything but holy and would definitely not be considered praise to God. I'm thankful to Him for His forgiveness however and most thankful for His whispers into my ears and heart when I am not meeting his standard nor his call on my life. Thank you Lord for your reminders no matter how difficult they are to hear sometimes.
The verse of the day from my flippy calendar yesterday was Mark 13:32-33, 36-37 NIV:
No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard! Be alert! You do not know when the time will come. If he comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping. What I say to you, I say to everyone: "Watch!"
Now this perplexed me. Not even the Son knows? Jesus Christ himself? I laid in bed last night thinking about this and even threw it at Jon who mumbled back something like, "Mmm. Wow. Interesting. Snozzzzzzzzz....." [Clearly he isn't taking literally the command to not be found sleeping.]
Has anyone ever caught this before? Have anything to say? I'll do my own set of investigation here but I'd be interested if anyone has anything enlightening to add. I mean we (okay, most believers) operate believing in three distinct persons: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. But I find it completely fascinating that they would operate separate from one another rather than as the old "three-in-one" that we all typically ascribe to. Why? What would be the purpose of the Son not knowing the day of God's return? And it also leads me to wonder, is Jesus Christ returning or is it truly only God? I mean, if the Son doesn't know the date, is the Son returning or is it only the Father? Semantics or something more?
The girls have been saving their money earned by jobs around the house and (shhh!) mom dumping her spare change as equally as possible into their jars. Ava has been saving specifically for a humongous "Cars" art pad which was exactly $9.99 at Target and Jillian just thought buying anything sounded like fun. So off we trekked to Target today.
Ava made her purchase and I dumped out a coin purse full of change (note to self: Coinstar to exchange coins to bills) and made her purchase. Next it was Jillian's turn. She proudly placed her Hello Kitty art pad onto the scanner and I counted out her change and handed it to the cashier. Suddenly, wailing ensued. Unsure what the problem was I told her that the cashier has to take her money. Jillian continued to scream that she didn't want me to give it to her and I thought that she just wanted to do it herself. After all, the child *is* two.
When we finally made our way to the parking lot, after scowls from the gentleman behind me and daggers from people around me who clearly have no children, I finally was able to get down to Jillian's level. I asked her what the problem was and she told me:
J: "I dont want the worker to take my money!"
M: "Honey, that's what the worker does. You buy something and she takes your money. You can't do it yourself."
J: "But I want to KEEP my mooooonnnnneeeeeyyyyyy!"
M: "You don't want to give it to her at all?"
J: "NO! I want to keep it all!"
M: "But then you can't buy anything?"
J: "I want to keep all of my money. I don't want to buy anything!"
Ah. She inherited her Grandpa B's penny-pinching ways. The poor child didn't want to part with her money for things.
Well, we made it into the car and Ava promptly tells her:
"Jilly, maybe you should just save all your money and give a little bit to God."
And Jillian responded with,
"Yes, Ava. That's what I'm going to do now. I don't want anyone to have my money again."
Grandpa, I hope you're proud!
We visited a place named Pennington Farms on our recent trip to Oregon. They make absolutely delicious pie turnovers and savories. YUM! Jillian enjoyed a few bites and we got back into the car. As we were driving I turned around to check on her and saw her chewing away on something in her mouth with a strange look on her face:
"Jillian? What's in your mouth, honey?"
"Ummmm. Pie nuts."
"Pie nuts?"
"Yes, pie nuts are stuck in my teeth from my pie."
"Do you mean berry seeds? From the berry pie?"
"Oh! Yeah! That's what they are. Berry seeds!"
Oh man, we were in stitches! Pie nuts!
Well, Jon and I have made a bit more progress on the yard. The grass is in and growing fairly well. The parking strip may have been a bad idea or maybe it was just a bad idea to skip the step of automatic sprinklers to the parking strip. Regardless, it's turning a lovely shade of crispy. We did make it out to the nursery and picked up some plants. As is always the case with us we are a bit impulsive and typically don't think through our purchases. When we got them home and planted them I had wished I had gone with a color scheme. Ah well. We had fun putting them in the ground and it sorta made it look like it was coming together. We re-purposed the flagstone pieces we had and made a little path. Pretty much in an attempt to acknowledge that our children will run across the flowers so we might as well give them a guide.
Eli swinging away at the park
Ava and Jillian with our first harvest from our garden
Eli is working on a mouth full of teeth right now. It just looks painful. This was shortly after the tops came in and I think he had no idea what to do with his mouth. Will it close? Ha! He now has four on top and two on the bottom. Some days we are reminded that Eli can grow. We walked into his room one day and saw him standing straight up in his crib just smiling away. The kid could have completely toppled over the edge, especially with his scaling abilities. Yeah, you'd think we'd get a hint after three kids. Really I think you're super safety-conscious with the first and it all goes downhill from there. We did lower the mattress (in case you were wondering).
We took advantage of the free transit day two weeks ago to ride light rail downtown and check out the Alice in Wonderland exhibit at the Children's Discovery Museum. The exhibit was only so-so but we had a good time. The train ride is always more of a hit than anything we do once we're there.
We accidentally discovered a free drumming class at our local library. We were there for our regular library trip and heard drumming coming from down the hallway. Ava opened up the door and we saw a handful of children drumming away. The instructor invited us to stay...and stay....and stay. Turns out the drum class lasts an hour. The kids had an amazing time and Ava went up to the instructor at the end and asked if they do this every week. Just for added clarification she then asked if they are there every week from 4:00-5:00pm. When he responded yes
she declared that we would be there the very next Thursday and every week after that. So we have gone pretty much weekly since then. Jillian isn't a huge fan but is warming up to it. Her favorite part is when they pretend to be a marching band and occasionally she shouts out that she is a rock star! Eli and Ava however are in heaven when there. I have never known an infant to sit for an hour and do anything but he is incredibly content to sit and bang away. I'm amazed sometimes at the hidden gems you sometimes stumble upon. Turns out the instructor is a librarian who
purchased the drums himself and teaches the class each week. 
Free is good but a class with an instructor who loves what he does is even better.
Jillian surprised me today with a fist full of her long blonde locks. "Mama! I cut my hair!" She was just beaming and I was just in shock so I grabbed the camera trying to minimize the situation so she wouldn't be tempted to do it again. "Just taking a picture for Daddy" I responded while knowing I was really trying to capture the humor of it all. The child is obsessed with fashion, color, hairstyles and everything sparkly. In fact, Jon and I just commented the other day that we should put the scissors away as any day now she would take them to her golden hair. Well, Jillian, here is the first picture for your style portfolio:
Now normally we wouldn't worry too much about her attempts to style her own hair. The child knows what she wants! But we are worried as she seems to also have a propensity toward tatooing. Take a look at what literally happened in the backseat of our van on a ride home from church:
I wish I could say this was the first time. If given a marker, the child instantly begins to draw on herself. And not small, tiny little marks but gleefully all over any patch of skin she can reach. She thinks its simply fabulous.
And I am simply making sure she stays far away from motorcycles.
Ava picked up this book a month or two ago and has been reading it non-stop ever since. Today she brought it to me and asked me to read through the sections on choking, drowning and teething. She tells me she likes it because it has babies in it. She is now even discovering symptoms and diagnosing Eli and Jillian for me. I have to say its a bit disturbing to read passages on drowning to your five-year old but hey, maybe she really is a doctor in training. The kid has a memory like a steel trap which should come in handy for memorizing the bones of the body and all sorts of weird diseases. What a crackup! Give us a call if you're needing some medical advice for your little ones. Perhaps Ava will act as your advice nurse.
Who is this guy, you ask? Only our last possible chance to break this awful streak of luck our San Jose Sharks have faced year after year, playoff series after playoff series. Yep, the San Jose Sharks are announcing tomorrow the hiring of Detroit Red Wings assistant coach Todd McLellan as Sharks head coach. Woot!
By the way, to the guy who sits in front of us at each game, I'd just like to point out that former coach Ron Wilson made a statement today that Vesa Toskala (now of the Toronto Maple Leafs) is one of the NHL's finest goalies. I would like to officially state for the record that despite Evegeni Nabokov's fine playoff performance (well, okay, most of it was fine) I still hold to my belief that they never should have let Vesa go. VESA! VESA! VESA!
[jon would say that all the opinions provided above are limited to sara and are in no way the expressed opinions of the olson family collectively]
I can't let my children get skipped over so here are pictures from Ava's fifth birthday. Can you believe five years have gone by? She is such a blessing to us. We are thankful to God every day that He gave us to her as her parents. Its amazing to look back and recall the events of her birth, the injury to her arm and the fervent praying we did for her healing. There are so many friends and family members who prayed for her...even strangers! We are constantly amazed at the "first miracle" (as we tell Ava) that God performed for her. Not only is her arm moving but it doesn't hold her back at all. She even completed her first season in baseball, something we weren't sure she'd ever do. Wow.
She is such a joy to our family. Her strong spirit, her thirst to learn, her care and compassion for others makes her special. We're excited to see her grow and change. We love you, Ava bug!
Jillian shows off her design
Grandma O made Ava a puppet theater, beautiful!
Ladies, have you gone to a Bible study lately? Let me guess... A study on motherhood? A study on what it is to be a good wife? Maybe a study on joy? Peace in a rushed life?
When was the last time you sat around the table or in a coffee shop or on the phone and had a true discussion on Christianity, the Word, the power of God with another woman? Not a pastor. Not your husband. Not your dad. Another woman.
See, I've been struggling with this lately. I dont know if its a soon-to-be-30 thing or what but I've really been looking at who I am and why I've become this person. I find myself lately struggling spiritually and not having an outlet to share. I'm not having a crisis of faith but rather a growth spurt of faith but I find myself limited as a woman to this false belief that Christian Women aren't interested in the down and dirty truths of scripture. Instead we're limited to exploring ourselves as Christ created us femininely. I've been invited or shared in studies studying what are supposedly five aspects of women (really? just five?), studies on what it means to be a faith-filled mother and a really bad study on what it is to be a faith-filled wife (it involved carrying a notepad around and writing down all the things my husband had to say. Ha!) But when I lately attempted to explore the concept of Holy Spirit power with a group of girlfriends I was given a blank look and a conversation change.
It extends into ministry as well. I've been involved in a fairly large ministry geared toward women and let me tell you that the time spent making things pretty (or thinking about making things pretty or shopping to make things pretty) far exceeds the time spent on thinking about what it means to be Christ-like and share Christ in a life-changing way.
I don't want to grow jaded but I'm beginning to wonder if the women in my life care. Has Christianity become just another thing to wear? A label to stick on ourselves? Or does it have a life-changing power that is evident in all things? Do women just not want to talk about scripture or challenge the way we do life? Or do they not know how?
I find that as women we're in a tricky spot as well. Since I don't have girlfriends to talk about these things with, it means I am left to discuss them with men. And I can only go so deep with another gal's husband or boyfriend. As I told Jon yesterday, its not like I can ask Jack Doe to go out to coffee with me so we can read through the book of Acts together. You all know it just doesn't work that way.
So instead I hold the three (yes, only three!) women in my life who I feel I can really be open and honest with close to my heart. But what's holding the others back? Is it feeling that you don't know scripture well? Is it feeling uncertain of your faith? Is it a feeling that someone else can say it better than you? The Word is powerful stuff but only if we're speaking it! A God-changed life is amazing but only if we're living it! And we can only grow if we're reading it, talking it and praying it. Clearly, I would love to do all three with you.
I've been trying to read this book written by Shane Claiborne. Its been a tough read and challenging to some of my ideas about God and how we view government, war and the like. Anyhow, I wanted to share that Shane will be in SF in July discussing his book and I imagine discussing intentional communities and new monasticism. Very intriguing stuff! I can't say I'm about to sell everything I have and intentionally move to the inner city quite yet but it inspires me to think about what God intended for the church and us as believers. Let's just say Paul wasn't working a 9 to 5 job with a mortgage while he was spreading the gospel an establishing the early church.
Here's a flyer for you. Let me know if you want to go and perhaps we can all head up together. I make no promises for content or theology only a promise for good food for thought. (They are touring nationwide so I'm sure he'll hit up a city near you as well)
So before going to Germany back in March, I received support for the trip from Sara's aunt's Church, Oasis Bible Fellowship(http://www.oasisbiblefellowship.org/) in Roseville, CA. Thats about 2.5 hours north of us in San jose and about 20 min north of our state capital, Sacramento (For all the non california readers).
Well they area a small church of about 50 members and so I was really surprised when they came forward with support. They have a heart for outreach and viewed me as a direct missionary for there church this year. What a great honor. Well their gift came with a stipulation, they would give me one amount guaranteed but if I came up and shared about the trip, they'd increase the amount. Well, since I really wanted to make sure the trip was paid for, speaking didn't seem to bad, as long as it was not a whole sermon! Today was the day for that sermon. Well just 5-10minutes. So I made up a presentation in powerpoint, not knowing what the church would have available. The speaking was good, people were interested in the Ship ministry which is really great. So just before church starts they tell they are way up on the technology! I'm talking live streaming video of the sermon on Sundays and recast all week on their website. This was a little daunting. So I was seen throughout cyberspace today. Like I said, it went great and really helped me remember why I went, what God touched me with since going and how God's love does shine through. Well we ended up going to the church picnic, sharing food and fun with a lively congregation. Even a little kick ball in the field. It was a long driving day, but the kids were perfect. Hope God touched you this Sunday, because Church is about connection to God and his people, not just a time to fill the hours between breakfast and lunch.
Jon and I have been taking classes through Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University the last few weeks at our new church home, Twin Oaks Church. Its been an interesting time. Our valley is full of people who are hurting financially right now. We are fortunately not in a tough situation but we were recognizing how lazy we were with our money. At the end of each month we were looking at each other with an expression of, "Where did we spend all our money?" Now Dave Ramsey has seven baby steps to financial freedom which include (in order!):
1. $1000 to start an emergency fund
2. Pay off all debt using the debt snowball
3. 3 to 6 months of expenses in savings
4. Invest 15% of household income into Roth IRAs and pre-tax retirement
5. College funding for children
6. Pay off home early
7. Build wealth and give!
Our class totaled up their debt and aside from home ownership (which was something like $10 million dollars worth) the class had about $3 million dollars in debt. Can you believe that??? At first I was just flat out shocked at that number and could NOT figure out how people could be so "irresponsible" with their money. But after working through our budget I realized that we really aren't any better. Sure, we live within our means and aren't operating in debt. But we're working without a plan. We'd just head out to dinner because we could. We'd start that home project because we could. We'd take a quick weekend trip somewhere because we could. But long term? Oh, that was so far off and besides, we contribute to a 401K so we don't have to worry. Right?
Anyhow, I'd like to say we've had some big epiphany and have scrimped and saved for our 6 months of expenses savings but we're not quite there yet. But it has changed how we're viewing our finances and our life. What are our priorities? How are we using what God is giving us to bless others and bless his church? I (Sara) am going through some growing pains as I humbly pull out my cash envelope system and pay cash (horrors!) for my groceries and document each penny I'm spending. But its been good and its disciplining me in ways I have never been disciplined before. Its causing Jon and I to look at our financial choices and our goals and develop a real plan to get there. We're thinking before we start a project and trying to learn the art of saving for our wants. None of this is new for our parents or grandparents but in this age of excess this is a new challenge for us. I suppose one could call it "the art of saying no....to ourselves."
Anyhow, I hope maybe this is encouraging to our friends and readers out there. We are seeing people in our class get serious about their debt and others get serious about their spending habits. I would wholeheartedly recommend this to everybody. The lessons aren't new but its that accountability that has helped us finally bite the bullet and make a budget. And its been fun. We're working our way through the Baby Steps and currently thinking a lot about our home, the high cost of Bay Area living and how this works with the things that we know God has called us to. We'll keep you all posted and maybe we'll all live long enough to see us make it Baby Step #7.
